When you encounter a problem or when you realize that you have a flaw
do you
a) blame everyone around you, close up and be bitter because everyone will hurt you
b) lie to yourself, that it is okay but treat everyone else as if they owe you a good life, love and friendship
c) become bitter and manipulative because nobody can be trusted and nobody can accept your flaw
or
d) do something about it, face the painful parts even tho it hurts like a motherfucker and get better, even if nobody else understands except (maybe) for the therapist (or if lucky, 1-2 friends). Because you know NOBODY wants to be with a loser who keeps hurting people around him.
I've been all of those before. I've hurt so much people with my self-centeredness in the past that now i decided that it has to stop. And i am at 4) now. And with this i will be normal and i wont scare people. Its about not wanting to hurt people anymore. Because to the other people, there is no excuse for hurting them in this way.
I may still be the crazy bitch aka a Jenny Schecter but i hope one day i wont be.
but which kind of person are you?
self-realization is the first step to actual recovery :) yay!
RépondreSupprimerIt's good that you have finally turn over a new leaf, better late than never right? As an avid reader of your blog, i could tell that you are nowhere close to being a crazy bitch. C'mon, don't be so harsh on yourself will ya? =) =)
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RépondreSupprimerI was a very good hearted person when I was young...but everything change after a very painful incident, I try to be strong by faking who I really am..that's why I hurt a lot of people around me...sometimes I really feel like I don't deserve anything good =) at all even love.
RépondreSupprimerI'm glad to read that you are changing to the last option for improvement... and I'm sure you can make it. U have my support.
RépondreSupprimerits ok to get hurt to appreciate the value of being human geh. the important thing is wat u've learn from it and move on to a better life. no one can take away ur pain except urself yah. hope ur getting better. hugs? :P
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